Merisik

Def. in English: pre-engagement ceremony that usually been directly translated as asking/ spying ceremony.


Merisik according to wikipedia:

The adat merisik (asking ceremony, or more literally 'spying custom') is the traditional Malay system for arranging marriages. When it is time for a young man to get married, his family will look around to identify a number of potential brides. Nowadays, the man might suggest to his family who he would like them to consider, and it may be that a romantic link already exists between the man and woman. Having decided upon one particular woman, the merisik, or investigation process, takes place. For this ceremony one or more representatives (wakil) of the man's family pay a friendly visit to the family of the woman whom they have in mind as his potential bride. The visit is purely for the purpose of further investigation, and it gives the visitors the chance to see the woman. A hint will be given to her parents regarding the purpose of the visit, and their reaction will be assessed. The woman's parents may also give the visitors some idea as to whether or not their daughter would be interested in the match. The merisik does not constitute a formal proposal. Following the visit both sides can begin to think more seriously about the possibility or otherwise of a marriage. It is possible that no progress may take place, and the man's parents or representatives will then look for another possible bride.

Simplified version of merisik according to me:

It's the first official visit that marks the seriousness of a relationship. It's more like the official visit to introduce your boyfriend/ girlfriend to your family (despite the many unofficial ones haha), with the intention of discussing engagement/ marriage. A merisik ring would normally be given to the woman as booking fees (haha - no pun intended!), and both sides would normally exchange few gifts (fruits and food) as token of acceptance. Back in the old days, wikipedia entry would be a much better definition of merisik, but in these modern days where love marriage rules, I think my definition would be better haha.


It was a cousin's ceremony. We could simplify the whole thing and transformed the whole merisik thingy into a simple engagement ceremony, but the groom-to-be side wanted to do it properly, and we're going to have another official ceremony for engagement.


It was a truly family affair (more like a small family gathering with lots of food). I was asked to help out with one of the gifts, and thus, the box with plums in it. It took me a day to prepare everything - the plums, the mounting boards for the box, the box template, the yellow wrapper, the quilled pieces, the idea arrangement etc.


I'm all for simplicity, and it's the best I can do in a short time. The design was inspired by Arabesque design- an element of Islamic art where geometrical patterns are repeated to form artistic motives.